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moople72 Cool Kid


Joined: 12 Sep 2007 Posts: 794 Location: KC
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Posted: Tue Jan 17, 2012 1:36 am
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| ZooeyLewis wrote: |
| I could live in this thread. I don't know what's worse... the intense, awful feelings I've been having lately or the point I've reached where I just become numb. I can't feel anything at all and being empty just makes me feel sadder when I DO feel something. I can be surrounded by people/friends and put on a happy facade, but even in a crowded room I feel like I'm by myself. Are some people just meant to have a miserable existence? |
ur a smart, sensitive person.
(sincerely) |
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neverending Don't Fuck With

Joined: 04 Aug 2003 Posts: 4556 Location: ontario
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Posted: Wed Jan 25, 2012 10:50 pm
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i'm incredibly homesick.
i want it to be spring/summer again. i want to be back home, running through the bush, picking blueberries, jumpng over rivers...sucker fishing...laying on the beach, canoeing.....sigh. _________________ "oh no! jabba is going to choose jenny lewis for his wife. R2D2 will destroy him!"
-Emily  |
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bergenergy Don't Fuck With


Joined: 24 Apr 2005 Posts: 4003 Location: Euphoria
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Posted: Thu Jan 26, 2012 11:00 pm
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| neverending wrote: |
i'm incredibly homesick.
i want it to be spring/summer again. i want to be back home, running through the bush, picking blueberries, jumpng over rivers...sucker fishing...laying on the beach, canoeing.....sigh. |
oh you nature girl
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neverending Don't Fuck With

Joined: 04 Aug 2003 Posts: 4556 Location: ontario
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Posted: Fri Jan 27, 2012 5:30 pm
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| bergenergy wrote: |
| neverending wrote: |
i'm incredibly homesick.
i want it to be spring/summer again. i want to be back home, running through the bush, picking blueberries, jumpng over rivers...sucker fishing...laying on the beach, canoeing.....sigh. |
oh you nature girl
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it sucks, there is NO snow here. it was snowing super bad earlier today...and its not all melted. i just want to make a snowman. _________________ "oh no! jabba is going to choose jenny lewis for his wife. R2D2 will destroy him!"
-Emily  |
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ZooeyLewis all-around quality person
Joined: 06 Sep 2010 Posts: 488 Location: Omaha, Nebrasky
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Posted: Fri Jan 27, 2012 7:15 pm
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Last night Evan Dando tried to hand me a set list and some 80 year old asshole ripped it out of my hand.  |
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comatisedheart all-around quality person

Joined: 29 Jan 2006 Posts: 141
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Posted: Sat Jan 28, 2012 3:23 am
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| ZooeyLewis wrote: |
Last night Evan Dando tried to hand me a set list and some 80 year old asshole ripped it out of my hand.  |
They're 80 and at a Lemonheads show. That's awesome.  |
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Built To Post Posting Machine


Joined: 04 Feb 2005 Posts: 2913 Location: Howell, NJ
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Posted: Sat Jan 28, 2012 10:09 am
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An 80 year old will always win the battle for a setlist. They want it more. Could be their last ever one. _________________ "When God gave us mirrors....he had no idea...."
My Morning Jacket - Librarian. |
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ZooeyLewis all-around quality person
Joined: 06 Sep 2010 Posts: 488 Location: Omaha, Nebrasky
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Posted: Sun Jan 29, 2012 3:41 pm
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| Built To Post wrote: |
| An 80 year old will always win the battle for a setlist. They want it more. Could be their last ever one. |
....This is true. |
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mojo shivers The Shit


Joined: 13 Jul 2004 Posts: 9677 Location: the goondocks
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Posted: Wed Feb 15, 2012 7:32 am
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Oh, But Boy Do I Remember The Strain Of Her Refrain, And The Nights We Spent Together, And The Way She Called My Name
--"Dixie Chicken", Little Feat
Enough time has passed I believe for me to start this little project up again. I don't know if I truly needed the last two months to collect my thoughts or if it was more of a cooling off period. I know how I get. I know what my writing becomes when I write in the heat of the moment. No good comes of it. It all sounds like thunder--full of fury, but ultimately leaving nothing physical behind. It's not the first time I've lost somebody and I'm probably thinking it won't be the last.
It reminds me that when it comes right down to it there's only a handful of people I can count on. While I can't stop myself from feeling a little saddened by the loss, the loss isn't something that's going to define my life. You can't define your life by what's missing from it. That's like describing a song by what you're not hearing, a painting by what you're not seeing. I have too many people in my life to constantly tether it to the absence, noticeable or not, of an individual. If she comes back, she comes back. That's why I'm not taking down the header because, when it comes down to it, I'm not the one walking away from her. My door is always open, my phone's always on, and she knows where to find me.
----
What I've been working on for the last few weeks is a little 'ole card game that was inspired by The Name of the Wind, the best book I've read in the last year. It's a trick-taking game called Corners that utilizes partnerships and powers, all aspects I really admire. It isn't my most creative endeavor--there's only so much you can do with a trick-taking game--but it's a solid game and I've been having fun playing it with local friends and friends from my boardgaming group. I don't know if it's going to go anywhere. I want it to, but I know the likelihood that it will be published is somewhat less than a dream right now.
One thing that it does have going for it is that I received encouraging words from the author, Patrick Rothfuss, when I mentioned to him that I had designed a card game based on the one mentioned in his book. He wrote back:
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I'd be curious to hear the rules for your game, and maybe even try a hand or two. But right now I'm absolutely burried in work, and if you e-mailed them to me, they'd just sit on my computer while I ignored them in order to get other things done. Then I'd feel guilty.
If you dropped me a line in a couple of months though, I might have a little free brainspace to devote to the project....
pat |
So there is that. I mean--the best case scenario would be I design a game he likes and he allows me to use the Kingkiller Chronicle name to promote it. I wouldn't even mind giving up some profits if it meant exposure to the hordes of loyal readers his books have. Hell, I'd feel honored just to have something I created be a somewhat small part of that universe. The worse case scenario would be to develop this project on my own, change the name, and have the only copy in existence because all the companies I contacted find it unpublishable. Even that wouldn't be so bad because I like playing it, and, it being a partnership game and all, I know at least three other people willing to play it.
That's kind of where I'm at right now. Unemployed, unattached, and yet still searching to do something that makes me happy even if it doesn't land me a job or the girl. I don't want to be the guy chasing down every hope only to be hurt again. It doesn't mean I'm going to give up on my dreams of happiness, it doesn't mean I'm not working hard to make my life somewhat more presentable. I'm just not willing to give up my self-respect or my sanity to do something desperate to get my game published or, in the former case, to get somebody back I deeply miss. There's a time and a place for sacrifice, for stowing away one's pride, but I don't think that time has come yet. I'm still the master of my universe and that's a place I'm intent on staying for the foreseeable future. It's taken me two months to realize that just because you don't get who or what you want doesn't mean you need to be sad over it. Plenty of people lose people or dreams that were important to them.
It just means you put your efforts into new projects, into new people. Or, better yet, it just means you go back to those endeavors, those individuals, that you know you can fall back on. Whether that's a friend you've known for almost two decades now and who has been nothing but understanding when you come bitching to her at five in the morning or that's a website you've been working on for the last eight years now--you have places to go to so you can mitigate the sting of disappointment and bitterness. True, you'll always remember the golden days when you felt like you had more than you have now.
But just because you've lost a step or two, it doesn't mean you stop walking forward. You just keep putting one foot in front of the other and eventually you'll be right again.
Yours Swimmingly,
mojo shivers _________________ "Right is right even if no one does it, and wrong is wrong even if everyone does it."
--Rachel Joy Scott
california is a recipe for a black hole |
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happyfish Posting Machine


Joined: 02 May 2007 Posts: 2973 Location: SLC, Utah
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Posted: Wed Feb 15, 2012 1:27 pm
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mojo: that is so rad the author emailed you back! My boyfriend loves that book, and he also loves designing games (in fact, he did so for a living for a while, but was laid off a couple years ago). I can't wait to tell my bf about what you're doing, he is going to think it is awesome. _________________ happiness is not a fish that you can catch. |
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mojo shivers The Shit


Joined: 13 Jul 2004 Posts: 9677 Location: the goondocks
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Posted: Wed Feb 15, 2012 5:05 pm
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| happyfish wrote: |
| mojo: that is so rad the author emailed you back! My boyfriend loves that book, and he also loves designing games (in fact, he did so for a living for a while, but was laid off a couple years ago). I can't wait to tell my bf about what you're doing, he is going to think it is awesome. |
Yeah, I was pretty excited when he wrote back. I had just missed his book signing by a few weeks when I started reading the first book. Believe me, if I had started the book before he came here I would have tried getting it signed and asked a few questions about it. From what I've heard, though, Mr. Rothfuss is pretty diligent about answering his fans. I just thought it was a shame nobody had come up with rules to that card game and apparently nobody has yet.
I'll probably write another note to him next month after I get a few more playtest sessions under my belt. _________________ "Right is right even if no one does it, and wrong is wrong even if everyone does it."
--Rachel Joy Scott
california is a recipe for a black hole |
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TheOtherOne420 Cool Kid

Joined: 31 Aug 2005 Posts: 920 Location: Boulder, CO
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Posted: Wed Feb 15, 2012 6:49 pm
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I just want to say that Little Feat is awesome. While Dixie Chicken is not exactly my favorite Feat tune, it does make me happy to see them get a shoutout around here. Been messing around with slide guitar lately, so Little Feat has been on the stereo a lot. |
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mojo shivers The Shit


Joined: 13 Jul 2004 Posts: 9677 Location: the goondocks
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Posted: Wed Feb 15, 2012 6:53 pm
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| TheOtherOne420 wrote: |
I just want to say that Little Feat is awesome. While Dixie Chicken is not exactly my favorite Feat tune, it does make me happy to see them get a shoutout around here. Been messing around with slide guitar lately, so Little Feat has been on the stereo a lot. |
I have a friend who, believe me, schooled me on the bands to look out for when it comes to Southern Rock within the first two years of knowing each other. Believe me, I've listened to a lot of Little Feat in my time. Good stuff. They have a lot more New Orleans/Cajun influence I'd like to say, which I appreciate. _________________ "Right is right even if no one does it, and wrong is wrong even if everyone does it."
--Rachel Joy Scott
california is a recipe for a black hole |
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TheOtherOne420 Cool Kid

Joined: 31 Aug 2005 Posts: 920 Location: Boulder, CO
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Posted: Wed Feb 15, 2012 8:18 pm
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| mojo shivers wrote: |
| TheOtherOne420 wrote: |
I just want to say that Little Feat is awesome. While Dixie Chicken is not exactly my favorite Feat tune, it does make me happy to see them get a shoutout around here. Been messing around with slide guitar lately, so Little Feat has been on the stereo a lot. |
I have a friend who, believe me, schooled me on the bands to look out for when it comes to Southern Rock within the first two years of knowing each other. Believe me, I've listened to a lot of Little Feat in my time. Good stuff. They have a lot more New Orleans/Cajun influence I'd like to say, which I appreciate. |
Oh for sure, love the Cajun feel to their stuff. I've been on a big kick lately of Little Feat/The Outlaws/Lynyrd Skynyrd (and the deep cuts from Skynyrd's catalog). Fun stuff to jam out and good bourbon drinking music too. |
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mojo shivers The Shit


Joined: 13 Jul 2004 Posts: 9677 Location: the goondocks
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Posted: Thu Feb 16, 2012 3:45 am
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| TheOtherOne420 wrote: |
| mojo shivers wrote: |
| TheOtherOne420 wrote: |
I just want to say that Little Feat is awesome. While Dixie Chicken is not exactly my favorite Feat tune, it does make me happy to see them get a shoutout around here. Been messing around with slide guitar lately, so Little Feat has been on the stereo a lot. |
I have a friend who, believe me, schooled me on the bands to look out for when it comes to Southern Rock within the first two years of knowing each other. Believe me, I've listened to a lot of Little Feat in my time. Good stuff. They have a lot more New Orleans/Cajun influence I'd like to say, which I appreciate. |
Oh for sure, love the Cajun feel to their stuff. I've been on a big kick lately of Little Feat/The Outlaws/Lynyrd Skynyrd (and the deep cuts from Skynyrd's catalog). Fun stuff to jam out and good bourbon drinking music too. |
Any music is good bourbon drinking music, in my opinion. Actually, even silence is good bourbon drinking music. LOL _________________ "Right is right even if no one does it, and wrong is wrong even if everyone does it."
--Rachel Joy Scott
california is a recipe for a black hole |
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TheOtherOne420 Cool Kid

Joined: 31 Aug 2005 Posts: 920 Location: Boulder, CO
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Posted: Thu Feb 16, 2012 5:14 pm
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| mojo shivers wrote: |
| TheOtherOne420 wrote: |
| mojo shivers wrote: |
| TheOtherOne420 wrote: |
I just want to say that Little Feat is awesome. While Dixie Chicken is not exactly my favorite Feat tune, it does make me happy to see them get a shoutout around here. Been messing around with slide guitar lately, so Little Feat has been on the stereo a lot. |
I have a friend who, believe me, schooled me on the bands to look out for when it comes to Southern Rock within the first two years of knowing each other. Believe me, I've listened to a lot of Little Feat in my time. Good stuff. They have a lot more New Orleans/Cajun influence I'd like to say, which I appreciate. |
Oh for sure, love the Cajun feel to their stuff. I've been on a big kick lately of Little Feat/The Outlaws/Lynyrd Skynyrd (and the deep cuts from Skynyrd's catalog). Fun stuff to jam out and good bourbon drinking music too. |
Any music is good bourbon drinking music, in my opinion. Actually, even silence is good bourbon drinking music. LOL |
LOL, yeah, true that.  |
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happyfish Posting Machine


Joined: 02 May 2007 Posts: 2973 Location: SLC, Utah
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Posted: Wed Feb 22, 2012 3:49 pm
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My cat is sick. I took her to the vet twice and 600 bucks later learned she is constipated to the point that it was causing her to puke. She hasn't pood since Sunday, and I'm sick of thinking about nothing except cat poo. _________________ happiness is not a fish that you can catch. |
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neverending Don't Fuck With

Joined: 04 Aug 2003 Posts: 4556 Location: ontario
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Posted: Thu Feb 23, 2012 2:28 am
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im going through a quarter life crisis. i say that because im only 23.
i'm miserable. and i don't know if its the city i moved to that's making me miserable or what. because i was miserable back home too. i love my job, most days. i think im in a rut. living in a basement is really dragging me down. but i cant afford to move or live anywhere else.
ive been looking at jobs back home, ive applied to a few. now i dont know if im just miserable because im so broke, so i dont know if me getting these jobs and moving back is really going to help. everytime i think about moving back i get really anxious, like its going to be a big mistake quiting the job i have now, but i also get excited.
work has slowed down, insane. I could have left at 8:30pm tonight if i wanted to. my shift ends at 11. I dragged it out until 10:30pm. So im worried im going to get laid off or fired. then forced to move back.
im also scared becuase the job i applied for, while it is a huge pay increase, and a stable, government job, my actual job duties would decrease. Sample prep. SO boring. i'd literally spend my days weighing samples and then adding acid. Whereas now I get to actual use chemical instruments and do chemical analysis..
ive also thought about going back to school too, for pastry. but thats an even bigger risk.
i just dont know what i want anymore. i need to go on a spirit quest and do peyote. _________________ "oh no! jabba is going to choose jenny lewis for his wife. R2D2 will destroy him!"
-Emily  |
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mojo shivers The Shit


Joined: 13 Jul 2004 Posts: 9677 Location: the goondocks
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Posted: Thu Feb 23, 2012 5:40 am
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| neverending wrote: |
im going through a quarter life crisis. i say that because im only 23.
i'm miserable. and i don't know if its the city i moved to that's making me miserable or what. because i was miserable back home too. i love my job, most days. i think im in a rut. living in a basement is really dragging me down. but i cant afford to move or live anywhere else.
ive been looking at jobs back home, ive applied to a few. now i dont know if im just miserable because im so broke, so i dont know if me getting these jobs and moving back is really going to help. everytime i think about moving back i get really anxious, like its going to be a big mistake quiting the job i have now, but i also get excited.
work has slowed down, insane. I could have left at 8:30pm tonight if i wanted to. my shift ends at 11. I dragged it out until 10:30pm. So im worried im going to get laid off or fired. then forced to move back.
im also scared becuase the job i applied for, while it is a huge pay increase, and a stable, government job, my actual job duties would decrease. Sample prep. SO boring. i'd literally spend my days weighing samples and then adding acid. Whereas now I get to actual use chemical instruments and do chemical analysis..
ive also thought about going back to school too, for pastry. but thats an even bigger risk.
i just dont know what i want anymore. i need to go on a spirit quest and do peyote. |
I'm kind of in the same boat. These next few weeks are going to be pivotal. I either need to find a roommate or one of those jobs I keep hearing will call me back will actually stay true to their word.
In the mean time I'm living life in denial. After mornings of applying and looking for employment I go out never letting my casual friends about how bad things have gotten. I just talk and act like it was two years ago, when I was gainfully employed and going out like mad.
March will be the last month I can pay my mortgage without assistance.
I just don't know what to do. I don't want to think about it. _________________ "Right is right even if no one does it, and wrong is wrong even if everyone does it."
--Rachel Joy Scott
california is a recipe for a black hole |
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happyfish Posting Machine


Joined: 02 May 2007 Posts: 2973 Location: SLC, Utah
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Posted: Thu Feb 23, 2012 11:11 am
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Emily, I want to join you on your spirit quest with peyote. _________________ happiness is not a fish that you can catch. |
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neverending Don't Fuck With

Joined: 04 Aug 2003 Posts: 4556 Location: ontario
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Posted: Thu Feb 23, 2012 1:45 pm
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| happyfish wrote: |
| Emily, I want to join you on your spirit quest with peyote. |
i wonder what my spirit animal is. i hope its something badass like a puma. _________________ "oh no! jabba is going to choose jenny lewis for his wife. R2D2 will destroy him!"
-Emily  |
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bergenergy Don't Fuck With


Joined: 24 Apr 2005 Posts: 4003 Location: Euphoria
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Posted: Thu Feb 23, 2012 11:26 pm
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| neverending wrote: |
im going through a quarter life crisis. i say that because im only 23.
i'm miserable. and i don't know if its the city i moved to that's making me miserable or what. because i was miserable back home too. i love my job, most days. i think im in a rut. living in a basement is really dragging me down. but i cant afford to move or live anywhere else.
ive been looking at jobs back home, ive applied to a few. now i dont know if im just miserable because im so broke, so i dont know if me getting these jobs and moving back is really going to help. everytime i think about moving back i get really anxious, like its going to be a big mistake quiting the job i have now, but i also get excited.
work has slowed down, insane. I could have left at 8:30pm tonight if i wanted to. my shift ends at 11. I dragged it out until 10:30pm. So im worried im going to get laid off or fired. then forced to move back.
im also scared becuase the job i applied for, while it is a huge pay increase, and a stable, government job, my actual job duties would decrease. Sample prep. SO boring. i'd literally spend my days weighing samples and then adding acid. Whereas now I get to actual use chemical instruments and do chemical analysis..
ive also thought about going back to school too, for pastry. but thats an even bigger risk.
i just dont know what i want anymore. i need to go on a spirit quest and do peyote. |
It's weird for me in that I have never been in this situation ever. All my jobs and relationships have fallen into place with very little angst.
Sounds like pretty difficult choices. _________________ Under cherry flowers none are strangers |
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happyfish Posting Machine


Joined: 02 May 2007 Posts: 2973 Location: SLC, Utah
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Posted: Fri Feb 24, 2012 11:50 am
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So, my cat finally pooped, but then she threw up twice. So she has to go back to the vet again this morning. Third time this week, and they have not a bloody clue what's wrong. I'm going to a different vet this time, one that has better reviews, maybe they'll find something...this is frustrating. I love my cat, it makes me sad that she is sick, and not to mention the fact that this shit is EXPENSIVE. _________________ happiness is not a fish that you can catch. |
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Heather Posting Machine


Joined: 12 May 2005 Posts: 2706 Location: springfield
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Posted: Fri Feb 24, 2012 1:10 pm
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| happyfish wrote: |
| this shit is EXPENSIVE. |
Pun intended? |
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neverending Don't Fuck With

Joined: 04 Aug 2003 Posts: 4556 Location: ontario
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Posted: Fri Feb 24, 2012 11:33 pm
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im so bummed.
I work in a lab, there are currently 5 lab techs and two shifts. Days (6-230) and afternoons (230-11). They want 2 day shifts, 2 afternoons, 1 mid (8-430)
Sean is straight "mid" shift, but he hasnt been working in the lab and is working on a "special project". fine by me, its dealing with solvents, I hate solvents.
Serena switched all of her afternoon shifts with Diana because she just had a baby.
So,
Serena = days
Diana = afternoons.
So that leaves me and Syd to be the only ones alternating. So me and her do 2 weeks days, 2 weeks afternoons.
As i mentioned in a previous post, I'm miserable and I want to take a pastry course. or maybe i didnt mention that, anyway, thats what i want to do. I found a cheap cake decorating class that is 4 weeks. THe class is from 630-830. I would have to leave early twice, at 6. I had asked my boss. Nope. ."thats what saturdays are for" he says...which, i understand, but im forced to work most saturdays.
So i asked Syd to switch. She said no, which is understandable, because I would too. Noone wants to work 6 weeks straight afternoons. Or, noone wants to work days monday, tuesday, afternoons wednesday, then days thursday friday. Working until 11pm one night, then at 6am the next day SUCKS. especially since lately afternoon shifts have been extending until 1-2am.
Stupid Serena. _________________ "oh no! jabba is going to choose jenny lewis for his wife. R2D2 will destroy him!"
-Emily  |
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