Relationships

**happyfish** · Posted: Tue Dec 22, 2009 7:28 pm Post subject:

My friend send me a text in which she referred to relationships as "relationshits." I thought it was fairly accurate.
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Built To Post · Posted: Thu Dec 31, 2009 2:24 am Post subject:

The last couple of weeks my girlfriend and I have spent tons of time together since neither of us have had work because of vacation time and the holiday break. It was hours upon hours of deep conversations of our pasts, what we want to do in the future, and how we feel about many things in general.

The words that she said were incredible. I knew she was a terrific person, but I had previously liked her mostly because of physical attraction. She's got such great drive, strength, and so much love in her heart. I was blown away by what an amazing person she truly is inside. I admire her beyond words.

I fell in love with her. I told her. She told me that she fell in love with me the night we met and it's only gotten stronger since.

I can't imagine being happier than this.
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**happyfish** · Posted: Thu Dec 31, 2009 12:10 pm Post subject:

bergenergy · Posted: Thu Dec 31, 2009 5:21 pm Post subject:

That's SO great. She sounds incredible.

You are too. All guy, but super considerate and nice and smart.

Having that conversation where you get in to all your deeper feelings so often makes or breaks.

Built To Post · Posted: Thu Dec 31, 2009 6:24 pm Post subject:

Thanks. You guys are the best!
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moople72 · Cool Kid Joined: 12 Sep 2007 Posts: 794 Location: KC

Built To Post · Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2010 9:04 pm Post subject:

Saturday I spent over 8 hours with my girlfriend's family. It was the most time I've spent with her father and the first time I met one of her brothers. I was a bit nervous beforehand, but we got along great. Her father called her Sunday to say how much he likes me, and that she better not screw this up ha ha.
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"When God gave us mirrors....he had no idea...."
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**happyfish** · Posted: Sun Jan 31, 2010 5:05 pm Post subject:

So, it has been over a month since i told my bf I love him, and he has not said it back. I'm getting really sick of waiting. He may never feel that way about me, and i'm starting to feel like i'm wasting my time. I know he cares about me, and everything in our relationship has been great the past month, but I want to be with someone who feels the same way about me I do about them. If he doesn't say it very soon, I will have no choice but to break up with him.
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happiness is not a fish that you can catch.

Built To Post · Posted: Sat Mar 27, 2010 5:39 pm Post subject:

I'm in love with her...fuck.
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"When God gave us mirrors....he had no idea...."
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**happyfish** · Posted: Mon Mar 29, 2010 3:58 pm Post subject:

HAhahahah. I forgot I hadn't posted in this thread for a while. I did break up with my boyfriend after posting that, and although it was super fucking hard and shitty, I am so glad I did. We were broken up for about a week before he came back and told me he was a fucking idiot and that he did love me. I probably posted about it in some other threads.
I knew he felt that way about me all along, I just needed to hear those words. He is an authentic person, and I know he wouldn't say something he didn't mean, especially something that serious. Things are going absolutely great between us now, I couldn't be happier.
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happiness is not a fish that you can catch.

Built To Post · Posted: Mon Mar 29, 2010 9:31 pm Post subject:

neverending · Posted: Tue Mar 30, 2010 4:59 pm Post subject:

im only going to break break your break break your heart.

lol
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v-rinny · Posted: Thu Apr 01, 2010 11:51 pm Post subject:

So, on a whim, I joined a dating website a few weeks ago. This guy who seemed to have somewhat (for the most part) of the same views as me, as well as a few same interests, contacts me, and from his pictures, he seems attractive, so we start talking. We met today, and I hope I don't sound like a bitch, but it was disappointing. The pictures on the site seem like they're at least a couple years old, because he looked different, and I don't think we really clicked, chemistry wise. I may give him another chance if he asks me out, but I don't know...I don't want to force anything.
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neverending · Posted: Fri Apr 02, 2010 2:20 am Post subject:

**happyfish** · Posted: Fri Apr 02, 2010 11:09 am Post subject:

Built To Post · Posted: Sat Jan 15, 2011 4:58 pm Post subject:

I'm in relationship limbo.

My girlfriend broke up with me two days ago because she's looking to buy a house, and she thought it made me distant and non-supportive during a stressful time for her.

She was right about that, because the situation made me feel like there was pressure on me to further our relationship when I was not ready for it.

I apologized to her for how I acted and explained that I still had doubts about our future. She told me that she never intended to put pressure on me, but because we were on the subject, it hurts her that she knew she wanted to spend her life with me within the first few months of dating and I still don't feel that way about her.

I gave her my reasons for doubt due to some differences as to who we are as people. She took some of those reasons as insults even though I didn't intend them to be in any way. They are just differences as all people have.

She demanded we exchange keys and other stuff we have at each others place. She got rid of her FB status of being in a relationship with me.

It really stung because I didn't want to lose her, but at the same time, I'm not ready to marry her. I had a huge pit in my stomach.

Turns out that she really sucks at breaking up though. She sent me many texts yesterday about random things going on in her day.

Early last night I told her that my brother wanted me to go to a bar with him. I said that she would be more than welcome to join us and we could start our new chapter as friends. She came.

I had spent the past two days telling myself how I'm now single and the positive sides of our break-up. I convinced myself that it was a good thing for me. I thought I knew we could be good friends leaving our past relationship behind us.

Then I saw her. The emotional barricades that I thought I built solid in preparation came crumbling down in an instant. The sight of her filled me with warmth. All I wanted to do was kiss and hold her.

We both had plenty of friends there that we hadn't seen in awhile, so they kept us busy in conversation. She had work early today, so she could only stay an hour. We never had time for a heart to heart conversation, but I could tell by the way she looked at me certain times, this isn't over.

We're technically broken up, but emotionally not even close to it.
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"When God gave us mirrors....he had no idea...."
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ZooeyLewis · Posted: Sat Jan 15, 2011 10:05 pm Post subject:

bergenergy · Posted: Sun Jan 16, 2011 1:54 pm Post subject:

Wow, Built (I'm sorry, is it Richard?), that's brutal going back and forth.

My wife always said she knew right away and it took me a while longer, which she sometimes used as a reason to be hurt. haha, but then she would lose it in a fight and scream 'we never should have gotten married,' I came back with 'you're the one who wanted it so bad'.

Anyway, for you, I guess at this point you have to ask why all of her attempts to take it to full commitment feel like negative pressure to you. I know I'm overly pro-marriage, but it seems like you two have been together long enough, and that you love her enough, to be ready for this.

I'm not quite sure how old you are, but, as crass as it sounds, that is a factor too. I'm surprised you haven't bought a house yet. With all your success on the job, I would think you would have made that investment, irrespective of a relationship.

I think the fact that you felt so bad about seeming to break up, and then so good about seeing her again, shows that she means more to you than anything else.

Just my Two Cents

You really are a truly great guy, so I can see why she's want to grab you. Smile

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bello_returns · Posted: Sun Jan 16, 2011 2:45 pm Post subject:

I have a couple rants on relationships that I need to get out. I have only been in one "serious" relationship and while it was great at first, it completely changed my outlook on relationships.

1. The older I get, the more I feel like marriage is an idealistic institution that rarely works. I do believe marriage CAN work, its just that I feel like most people don't give it the proper time and/or thought. I also feel like society pressures people (especially women) to get married when its really not necessary to have a successful relationship.

2. I hate the Hollywood image of being in love. As someone who has BEEN in love, its not always pleasant. You feel emotionally out of whack, you're hyper sensitive over tiny problems and while there are definitely pleasant aspects of it, Hollywood often ignores the downside to it. Love creates jealousy, paranoia and insecurity. I almost feel like its similar to being drunk. When you're drunk you feel loose and uninhibited but you also throw up and fall down.

3. So many of my friends (mostly girls) are in relationships that have little to nothing to do with love. They stay in the relationships they are in simply because financially speaking, thats their only choice. They can't AFFORD to break up. I think this is the saddest situation of all. This is why I strongly urge people to make sure you are financially self-sufficient BEFORE you move in with a lover.

4. And lastly, I despise when people run from their emotions. Its us guys who are the most guilty. Admission of how you feel about someone doesnt necessarily mean that anything has to change. I'd rather hear someone say "I'm in love with you but my I'm not at liberty to be in a relationship right now" than be lied to and hear "fuck off, i dont see you that way" when its completely obvious that you do. If you really care about someone just be fucking honest with them whether its good or bad. And trust me, they will KNOW if you're telling the truth because actions speak much louder than words

I'm not a cynic who doesnt believe in love or relationships. I do actually. Do I think people mistake other emotions for love? Yes. Do I think the odds of people having successful relationships is much lower than its generally thought to be? Yep. But I DO think its possible. Just don't be dumb about it. Again, love also makes people's IQ go down a few points (trust me on this one), so yes use your heart but let your brain step in here and there too. Rant over.
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Built To Post · Posted: Sun Jan 16, 2011 3:14 pm Post subject:

Built To Post · Posted: Sun Jan 16, 2011 3:20 pm Post subject:

neverending · Posted: Sun Jan 16, 2011 4:07 pm Post subject:

don't even get me started.......

Okay, when i was 14 i started dating this guy evan, we broke up when i was 18. so we dated for about 4 1/2 years. he broke up with me for this girl Britt.

This past September he confessed his undying love for me, he even kisses me, after his grandfathers wake. he ended up "taking a break" with his girlfriend because he was conflicted and he didn't know if he still wanted to be with her. he was saying stuff about how he should stay with her because she has family issues right now and how she has no friends and has noone to talk to about all this other stuff, so leaving her would just "add to the mess" (first off, how is that a reason to stay with someone?!) he was going to break up with her in the summer, but than all this family stuff happened.

so during the time he was separated from her, we were practically dating. spent pretty much every day together, texted/talked on the phone all the time, he even was deciding on going to university down my way and living with me.

i went home for new years eve and he said 'oh lets go out for dinner blah blah blah' and we did. he was talking about us getting married, ect ect. i had asked him if him and brit were back together (he told me they spent new years together) he said no.

turns out he lied to me, right to my face. i found out later on that night, via a friend that they were dating. i had asked him again, and he still said they werent, even though shes running her mouth, and posting it on facebook (he doesn't have facebook, so it just says shes in a relationship)

well, she had found out we hooked up. she only heard once, but i guess that was enough for her. he told her that it was all him, but she still blames me. so basically she said he can never see me/text me/ call me/ basically ever talk to me. again. even though i live 5 hours away. so there goes 8 years of friendship down the drain.
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"oh no! jabba is going to choose jenny lewis for his wife. R2D2 will destroy him!"

-Emily Heart

Built To Post · Posted: Sun Jan 16, 2011 4:15 pm Post subject:

Emily, that brings up something that is extremely important.

Honesty.

We all have our faults and flaws, but being honest about them to someone else is the only chance to find true happiness with someone that loves the real you.

Lies benefit no one.
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"When God gave us mirrors....he had no idea...."
My Morning Jacket - Librarian.